Lion's Pride Family of Products

Listen up: The decision has been made... by Judge Matthew Kacsmaryk (a pustule of the MAGA movement in Amarillo Texas) that will adversely affect over a million women, and piss off many millions more. But he didn’t do it all by himself! He did it because there are far too many crazed religionists out there whose right-to-life fervor does not extend to violated mothers or underage daughters. You see, the Christian Medical & Dental Associations (< Dental?? I kid you not!) is part of an alliance that brought this lawsuit because they thought unthinking Christians (which is a major part of their religion, especially those who forget to brush their teeth) could be bamboozled somehow into taking Mifepristone® (an early abortion pill!).

I know…. Stupid. And because Christians are so stupid, they feel this pill cannot be made available to anyone else.

But wait! Nobody is forcing Christians to take birth control measures.Nobody is trying to shove Mifepristone® down Christian throats. Nobody is forcing any Christian to abort a baby. Since that is obviously the case: What is their fucking problem?? It’s time to get their religion out of our face! (And out our mouths.) But I guess they can’t… Wasn’t it St. Paul who told them to go out and pester pagans?

It’s a shame really. When Christianity first began, in many ways it was humble, tolerant, and generous. Then it got power, and immediately became oppressive, intolerant, and obnoxious. It would be nice to get back to those innocent beginnings. But how exactly to do that??…

Introducing… Lion Food®